It was that kind of night.
Well, that was some kind of Senior Night, yes? Your Washington State Cougars jumped out to a 14-0 lead early on and never looked back, thoroughly dominating the fake tough guys known as the Colorado Buffaloes, enroute to a 56-14 curb-stomping. It was the kind of fun and cathartic 3+ hours that we Coug fans have been missing for the better part of two months.
Friday night’s victory was WSU’s sixth consecutive odd-year Senior Day/Night victory, with the last loss coming in overtime to Utah back in 2011. Since then, the Cougs have run off an impressive streak, defeating the likes of Stanford, Arizona, Utah, Oregon State and Colorado. “What about the even years?” you ask. Well, the answer is that I don’t think WSU has held Senior Day/Night in the even years for some reason, and I’m not going to ask any questions.
The Good
Sent the Seniors off right ✅ #GoCougs | #WAZZU | #CVE23 pic.twitter.com/16BLkd8ubA
— Washington State Football (@WSUCougarFB) November 18, 2023
- Really cool uniforms and associated hoodies, WSU. Bravo!
- The second I saw Deion Sanders wearing a headset over a hooded parka over a knit cap, I was pretty sure Colorado had zero interest in this game.
- I was…impressed by the crowd? Indeed! Friday night, cold temps, team on a six-game losing streak etc. etc. I figured the bleachers would be practically empty. And while the student section was predictably deserted – gotta get in that extra night on mom and dad’s couch in their newly-converted office! – the rest of the place looked pretty good.
- Who doesn’t like OPP bump music? Well done, Fox.
- When the game began, it was hard to tell what to like more, the offense, defense or special teams, but we’ll start with the defense. The first drive was a rather solid indicator of what was to come, as solid WSU coverage on 3rd-and-5 resulted in a Ron Stone sack and a Colorado punt.
- That handoff to Lincoln Victor was a great play! Where has that been!? Great scheme and execution, as Christian Hilborn and Roderick Tialavea blocked it perfectly to pave Victor’s way to the end zone.
- Pretty magnanimous of Ron Stone to set up so many Brennan Jackson touchdowns. First he did it against Wisconsin, and then again against Colorado.
- Brennan Jackson had two carries for 114 yards and two touchdowns. Colorado had 41 carries for 91 yards and one touchdown.
- I love how the Fox announcers were drooling all over travis Hunter as Kyle Williams was drawing a PI flag on one play, then torching Hunter for a 34-yard touchdown on another.
- I’ve watched a lot of football, but I’ve never heard an announcer utter the term “bastard read and look.” I had to rewind the TV just to make sure that’s what I heard. Props to Spencer Tillman!
- Leyton Smithson my word! Just when Colorado may have thought it could get back in the game, Smithson went 98 and ended it before the first quarter was even finished. Those were some damn wheels!
- Colorado first half possessions after the Smithson house call: 3 plays, 8 yards / 3 plays, -3 yards / 3 plays, 1 yard / 3 plays, 3 yards.
- Perfect check to the Watson swing pass on WSU’s fourth touchdown. That play has been deadly this season.
- I am almost never a fan of the dumb “overrated” chant, but I thought it was rather fitting when the WSU students did in IN THE SECOND QUARTER. Such a perfect thing to shout at a team full of fake tough guys.
- Here for this trolling all damn day:
It was personal for Washington State in the first quarter pic.twitter.com/cD64k4BNzo
— FOX College Football (@CFBONFOX) November 18, 2023
- The announcing team wasn’t exactly on its “A” game Friday, but Tim Brando did have a great line when a Colorado player committed such a bad false start that he fell on his ass, saying he’s done the same thing before, but it usually happened after a night out with Bill Rafftery. Perfect.
- Nakia Watson didn’t have a eye-popping night on the stat sheet, but man, he was running like a man possessed on several carries. He’s so different when healthy.
- Pretty solid Colorado punt to pin WSU at its own 3 yard line. No matter, as the Cougs were in the end zone 4+ minutes later.
- One of the most hilarious plays of the season merits a mention here, as Colorado QB Gavin Kuld, wearing #23, threw a pass that Nusi Malani deflected. No big deal, as those things happen. BUT THEN! Kuld catches it! And…throws again!!?? You have to admire the kid’s will to make a play. Except that his second (and illegal) pass ended up in the hands of Taariq al-Uqdah. I could watch this 50 times.
The QB caught his own pass and threw an INT in the same play pic.twitter.com/BfHHrEop0U
— FOX College Football (@CFBONFOX) November 18, 2023
That is a next-level “this is not your night” kind of play.
- Nine tackles for loss. Prettay prettay prettay good.
- Also pretty good – 6/11 on third down for WSU, 4/16 on third down for Colorado.
- Man, what a pretty Ward pass to Josh Kelly after he beat Shiloh Sanders, but before the safety could get there.
- This is a good tweet:
“I spoke with Colorado head coach Deion Sanders at halftime, and he said everything is looking fine.” pic.twitter.com/mQXh2dw4tX
— Josh Newman (@Joshua_Newman) November 18, 2023
The Bad
- I’ve had YouTube TV for over a year, and it’s mostly great. Except when you record a sporting event that has the previous event run into its window. For some reason, you can’t fast forward. So I had to sit there and endure all the pretend hype for like 10 minutes instead of speeding to the opening kick. Do better, YouTube TV.
- “I don’t care if we’re 4-6 and my team is terrible after I spent the entire month of September running my mouth about receipts! I’m wearing this damn bejeweled whistle by god!”
– Deion Sanders, probably
- How on earth did Joseph Roback not block that punt?
- Hey Deion, maybe think about recruiting linemen like you recruit receivers and DBs.
- Speaking of that, it was rather pleasing to watch the nation’s #1 corner back recruit get worked over on play after play.
- One big issue I have with WSU’s propensity to hurry – Nakia Watson took a rather obvious shot to the head in the first quarter, but WSU ran another play so quickly that nobody had time to figure out whether it was an illegal hit. This has happened more than once.
- It was probably the nature of the blowout that papered over the usual #Pac12ref incompetence, but there were still some moments! Like the time a Colorado pass bounced off a lineman, which is illegal, and wasn’t called. Or the time a Colorado DB tackled Josh Kelly running open, which drew a flag, only for the refs to go “Nah, he wasn’t legally assaulted so we’ll pick up the flag.” Or the blatant facemask they ignored near the end because “let’s just end this.” Okie dokie.
- Looked like Quinn Roff got dinged up again. Man, what a bummer of a year he’s had.
- I don’t know if Cameron Johnson was down, or if he fumbled. What I do know is he shouldn’t play, because every time he catches a pass, the ball ends up with the other team.
- Shadeur Sanders has his own body man? Really? How full of yourself do you have to be?
The Ugly
- Deion Sanders, when talking to last place in the Pac-12:
- I mean, the Cougs just beat Colorado 56-14, in their final home game of the season, officially closing the door on Colorado’s bowl hopes, so there really isn’t anything to put here, and I could probably lament the path WSU took to get its fifth win, but let’s be happy for a bit.
Go Cougs
Highlights!
More Great Tweets!
Nakia. Man.
What a run from Watson! @WSUCougarFB pic.twitter.com/xIAJHaXGgt
— FOX College Football (@CFBONFOX) November 18, 2023
Solid callback here.
HE JUST DID WHAT?!?! @leytonsmithson2 #GoCougs | #WAZZU | #CVE23 pic.twitter.com/PgQRrZgoDf
— Washington State Football (@WSUCougarFB) November 18, 2023
Yep, we own the Buffs. In Colorado’s brief Pac-12 stint, WSU was 6-2, winning by an average score of 34-16. Clearly, Deion bought that “Louis” bag from a side alley hustler in Seoul.
W.#GoCougs | #WAZZU | #CVE23 pic.twitter.com/mgRTdizVuv
— Washington State Football (@WSUCougarFB) November 18, 2023
We’ll miss beating your asses every year, Buffs.
Interviews!
This Week in Parenting
I noticed the 12 year-old photographing a sheet of paper the other night, and immediately suspected something was afoot, so I asked what he was up to. Turned out the paper was a study sheet for the rules of volleyball, and he was texting it to his buddy because they had a quiz the next day and his buddy had forgotten his study sheet. Pretty solid bro move. Then I asked whether he’d studied for the quiz. “Yes,” was the answer, so I told him to give me the sheet so I could quiz him. “Umm, I mean, no.” Well I, for one, was stunned at this turn of events.
So he goes and studies for probably 90 seconds, and declares himself prepared. The initial quiz went about as well as you’d predict. Another two minutes of preparation follows. On the second quiz, he finally gets one right, to which I declare, “Hang a banner,” before he went on a streak of misses. More studying. On the third try, he gets two in a row and declares, “I am him.” Alrighty then. Things reached their nadir during the definitions quiz. I was reading the definition for game point, and he had to guess the term. Repeatedly, I emphasized game and point. Did I say repeatedly? Despite that, no correct answer was reached, and on it went. He reports that he got a 95% on the quiz, so god only knows what that score would have been if I hadn’t caught him sending a pic to his buddy.
On the teenager front, this week brought the postseason football banquet, which basiclaly turned out to be the varsity coach talking at length. Much, much length. The invitation for the banquet listed the dress as “business casual.” As I learned once again Tuesday evening, if you’re a Florida Panhandle lifer, that means your nicest pair of jeans and a new ballcap.
So now we’re on to wrestling, where the kiddo gets worn the (bleep) out at practice. But enough about that. Allow me to talk about the certifiable insanity that is high school youth sports costs. I was out of town for the parent meeting, so Mrs. Kendall attended, where she learned that each wrestler had to purchase a hoodie, sweatpants, and a gym bag, for the low low price of something like $200. Doesn’t sound too excessive for a season, right? Oh, you poor, naive little fellow.
Not only were we required to pay for gear, it also costs $300 just to participate! At a MF’ING PUBLIC HIGH SCHOOL!!! So now we’re up to $500 and the kid hasn’t even seen his first match. But wait! We ain’t done! There’s also a fund raiser! If you have kids who play sports, you’ve likely seen this scheme, where you have to provide 20 email addresses so some company can spam your friends and relatives with coupon book offers or whatever. In other words, the same thing we had to do for football, and Junior ROTC, oh and there was also the Boy Scouts and their overpriced popcorn sales and Christmas wreath fundraiser.
When is it enough? Do these people think we have like 10,000 friends and family members? Because if we actually tried to meet the minimum number of contacts every time, the same people would be getting request after request. It’s beyond ridiculous to expect these kids and their families to beg for money time after time after time. And again, this is a public high school sport! Not a travel squad. Not a private school. The wrestling coach said every wrestler’s goal was to raise $500, to which I told Mrs. Kendall, “Well I hope some kid raises $1,000 to make up for ours, who won’t bring in a dime.” Oh, and did I mention that the wrestling team also has 17 sponsors?
tl;dr if anyone knows one of those oil barons paying for Jimbo Fisher’s buyout, send them my way, because they obviously have money they can set on fire.
Non-Sports
The Secrets of the JFK Assassination Documents
After the CIA was compelled to release all the information it knew about the JFK assassination, a dogged journalist tracked the Agency’s lies about Lee Harvey Oswald — and its attempt to cover them up.